Friday, September 30, 2011

REDEDICATION GIVEAWAY: WE HAVE A WINNER....


Congratulations to Shenina Brown for being the winner of the Rededication book giveaway.  And thank you to everyone who entered the contest: Shenina, C.A. Hayes, Nikki, Angel Bernice, and @Uchelala. More great giveaways to come. Also, a special thanks to Armond Mosley, author of Rededication for offering this great book for the giveaway.

Congratulations again Shenina :-)

Happy Friday all :-) Have a great weekend.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

[PHOTO FAB] INSPIRED SISTAHS ROCK!

This photo put a HUGE smile on my face. It's life coach, Tangie Henry (center, with guitar) surrounded by "inspired sistahs" at the recent Pathway to Purpose retreat. The picture itself is so inspiring (I love to see positive images like this, especially among us) so I just had to post it. Congratulations Tangie on a very successful Pathway to Purpose retreat. God bless you and all of the inspired sistahs :-)
Check out Tangie's site at InspiredSistah.com 




Friday, September 23, 2011

{GUESS WHO'S GETTING MARRIED?} JENNIFER & JEFF 9-24-11

I just want to send a very special congratulations to Jennifer and Jeff on their upcoming wedding (I like how they call it their covenant ceremony). That's right, they get married tomorrow. Jennifer and Jeff: May God bless you now and for years to come. Have a fabulous wedding day.

If Jennifer's face looks familiar, it's because I featured her back in April for Featured Future Wife. She is the first COAFW bride to go down the aisle :-) *happy dance* I look forward to making more announcements like this :-) Congratulations again Jennifer & Jeff :-)

See Jennifer's feature here

Soon-to-be Mr. and Mrs. Tyler

Thursday, September 22, 2011

A GREAT GIVEAWAY: REDEDICATION BY ARMOND MOSLEY

So we've been kickin' it with the Mosleys for the past two days. It's so fitting to include the book that shares, in full, Armond's journey and the love story of him and his wife, Nneka. With that said, Chronicles is doing another great giveaway :-) Below are the details.


GIVEAWAY DETAILS:
-Subscribe to Armond's tweets @iammosley and mine @the_future_wife
-Retweet this entire phrase: "I've entered the #Rededication giveaway by @iammosley. You should too!" Details here: http://chroniclesofafuturewife.blogspot.com/ Please RT 
-Only one RT is necessary. Simply copy and paste the phrase to your timeline.
-Leave a comment on this blog saying that you want to enter the Rededication giveaway.

Note: To help keep track of entries, along with acknowledging that you want to be entered into the giveaway, please indicate your subscription to @iammosley and @the_future_wife and that you have retweeted the giveaway phrase.


Example:  
I want to enter the Rededication giveaway 
I'm subscribed to @iammosley and @the_future_wife
I retweeted the giveaway phrase


Each of the above will be considered as an entry


*A winner will be chosen next Thursday, September 29, 2011


BEST WISHES TO ALL PARTICIPANTS :-)



Want to know more about the author and Rededication
Armond's bio here 
Armond's feature here



Wednesday, September 21, 2011

WEDDING WEDNESDAY: NNEKA & ARMOND MOSLEY

I mentioned before that when I saw Nneka's dress on her blog, I literally gasped. Then there was the bright and bold color, combined with an elegant accent, that she chose for the Big Day, topped off with personal touches since she is very creative --and was a very creative-- DIY (do-it-yourself) bride. Today, Nneka tells us about her special day and shares some great advice of why all of it is worth waiting for. Her groom, Armond also shares his sentiments about their Big Day.

Their love story is so inspiring, who wouldn't want to know how the rest of the story went?


Nneka & Armond Mosley
Wedding Date: October 17, 2009
Wedding Location: Petersburg, VA

What was your favorite part of your wedding day?
My favorite part of my wedding day was walking down the aisle, surrounded by all my family and friends, and seeing the man I have no doubt in my mind that the Lord made for me, waiting at the end for me!


Did you have a theme?
I did a damask theme and our colors were hot pink, black & white.


Did you do the traditional, "something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue?"
No, I didn't do that


How long did you have to plan?
We had about 6 months.We got engaged in April 09 and got married in Oct 09


How much time did you spend dress shopping? How did you know when you found "the one"?
Dress shopping went nothing like I envisioned it would. I always assummed I would try on a zillion dresses and have all my friends with me. I ended up putting a deposit down on one of the first dresses I saw.... I liked it but didnt really love it...but I figured I was running short on time and people kept telling me I need to hurry up and get a dress.... so I rushed it. The same exact night after I put deposit down on first dress, my best friend sent me a link to a website. I saw a dress I loved so I went to visit the store shortly after and instantly knew that was my dress!!


Did you have a lot of help planning the wedding?
No, I planned the wedding myself and Armond helped out with some things.


You are really creative and used that creativity to make things for your wedding. What are some of the things that you DIY'd for your big day?
Wow, there were so many things I did myself I dont know if I even remember them all! I did our invitations, placecards, bouquets (with the help of a few friends), cardbox, table centerpieces, did my own hair, etc.



How did you come up with the idea of having an Inner Circle?
Armond and I both have soo many great family members and friends who we wanted to include in our big day but didn't want a thousand people standing in the front of the church so we came up with the Inner Circle idea to include them.



What was your thought when you first saw your husband waiting at the end of the aisle for you?
I felt so blessed and happy!


A lot of COAFW readers are waiting for the day when they say "I do". How would you encourage them to wait for the man God has chosen for them?
I would encourage them to trust in God's timing and plan. We often want things to happen when we want them to happen and when they dont, we can sometimes feel like God isn't listening to our prayers. But God's timing is never off and I would encourage anyone waiting on the man God has for them to never forget God knows the desires of their heart. He wont leave you hanging.





From the Groom

Can you share what your wedding day meant to you ?
Wedding day was huge! It was the culmination of a long journey. One that began disconnected with God and concluded with an understanding of His role in my life. That understanding is what allowed me to be in position to receive my wife. And so, that's what the day meant to me. A day that represented restoration that only He could provide.

What were you thinking of before going down the aisle?
Well, I was nervous...lol. Nervous because I couldn't believe that I was actually getting married. I always wanted to, but it had come up so quickly. I was thinking how just 2 and a half years ago, I questioned whether or not I would find a mate as a result of my choice of celibacy. Also, I found myself humbled b/c I didn't "really" think I deserved Nneka. She was a reminder of God's awesomeness and I was just thankful that He trusted me enough to have her as my wife.

What was your thought when you saw your wife for the first time?
First thought was "Wow!" In fact, the videographer mentioned after the wedding that he heard me actually say "wow"...lol. She was absolutely beautiful. I was geeked...lol. I couldn't stop smiling. I was so excited that she would, in a few minutes, be mine...all mine! (LOL!)

Can you reflect on what it meant to you to see how God orchestrated the day that you would say I do" to your wife?
He is so good to us. Even when we try to distance ourselves from Him, He never leaves or forsakes us. And how He orchestrated my wedding day was just an awesome thing. God deserves all the praise and I'll forever remember my wedding day as a gift from Him because we didn't do anything...anything to deserve it.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

WORTH THE WAIT: ARMOND & NNEKA MOSLEY

The perk of featuring couples who have yielded their relationships to Christ is that it, in turn, encourages me. It's not always easy "walking and waiting" but it's definitely worth it. Oftentimes, even as Christians, we think that being intimate (having sex) before marriage is ok and have disregarded the command that sex is reserved for marriage (1 Corinthians 6:18; 7:1-4). Today's couple gives us a great illustration of what it looks like to be obedient to God in remaining celibate until marriage, that it's very "doable" --not in our own strength but through Christ--, and it's worth the wait.

Meet Armond & Nneka Mosley.


Both: How important was it that you were friends before you were married?
[Armond] I believe it was very important because our friendship is what has been the foundation of our relationship. We're pretty simple people and so, we just really enjoy hanging out with one another. Whether it be watching our favorite TV shows together, going to a movie or just sitting and discussing our dreams, we find so much satisfaction in the fact that we can do these things so effortlessly. Often times when friendship is lacking, these simple activities can become a cumbersome task. [Nneka] Being good friends for years before ever getting romantically involved and ultimately married was a great thing for us! It allowed us to truly get to know one another and develop a close bond as friends before either of us even looked at each other as more than friends.


Nneka: As women, some of us aren't used to being in a relationship where there isn't an expectation from the man to want sex. How did Armond being celibate make a difference in your relationship?
Initially, I had a hard time with readjusting my mind set and what I was used to in relationships. Small things like not sleeping in the same bed together took some getting used to for me. But overall, I'm really thankful that Armond was so strong on his stand of being celibate because it gave me an excellent example to follow. And both people really have to be on board for it to work.

Armond: How did you adjust to showing your wife affection in a non sexual way before you were married?
Great question. Well, for one, I had to be more intentional about doing "acts of service" and giving "gifts." Nneka is big on both of them and I've never been good at giving either historically (still working on it too!). But, I had to make sure that I showed her by my actions that I loved her. Sometimes it would be something simple like washing her dishes, folding her clothes or cleaning her apartment. Other times it would be through a thoughtful sign of affection; flowers, gift card to favorite store and cooking for her. Aside from these things, I made sure that I used words to communicate how I felt about her. With sex/physical contact not being in play, I didn't have the luxury of pulling the old "girl, you know how I feel about you" line that us men are accustomed to using...lol.

Both: Some women think it's necessary or part of the relationship to give their body away before marriage. Armond, can you share, in your opinion, what that really signals to a man? Nneka, what would you say to a young lady who is giving her body away before marriage yet is still praying for the one?
[Armond]Well...let's just be honest. That old saying "why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free" is true. While men will make it appear that they aren't judging you because you gave it up, in the back of every man's mind they would prefer you put up a fight. So, even in the secular sense, its never cool to "give it up" early in relationship. We, men, we're built to WORK. So, ladies, at least make him work for it...if it comes easy, he'll never have the same level of respect for you. It's that simple. Now, that said, I'm a full proponent of waiting until marriage because to me, that is the right way to do it. Plus, it gives women the ultimate leverage. As the saying goes, "anything worth having is worth working for." And men want to feel like they are rewarded for their hard work and thus, if you give in too soon, you'll never get to see the level of hard work or effort that could have been. This usually plays out in his dragging out the time period before popping the question or getting lazy and no longer trying to woo you.

[Nneka]For most women, I think we often think sex is something we have to do to get & keep a man. While I know there are some women out there who may feel they are getting just as much out of it as the man, at the end of the day, I don't believe women are generally built that way. Most women are doing any and everything they can to show a man why we ultimately would make a great wife. Instead of placing our complete trust in God to send us a mate, we take matters into our own hands. Compound that with the old saying we here so often... "Well if you aren't doing it, there will always be someone who will." Its constant things like that which encourages premarital sex. But if you aren't doing it, and a man doesn't want to deal with you because of that fact alone...its a good chance he isn't the "one" anyway. I can only speak from personal experience and since I did engage in premarital sex myself, I can understand wanting to do the right thing but falling. So I would say to the young lady to place complete trust in God and His plan for her life. No matter how unrealistic it may seem that the Lord will actually bring you a man who is celibate...nothing is too BIG for God!!!


Both: What kind of support system did you have to help you in your walk?
[Armond] I had Nneka and two male friends who were really on board with the walk early on. They helped to hold me accountable each step of the way. They were key and because God was the basis of our friendship, they were not only able to hold me accountable, but they were also able to pour into me in those moments where I found myself discouraged. Additionally, they too had committed to the walk and I think that also served to be a key piece of our relationship and foundation for a support system. I had other friends too, but these three were really in the "trenches" with me and that was invaluable. Aside from "peers," I also had a few ministers who served as mentors as well. Like my friends, they poured into me too, but they also stretched my faith and challenged me to grow deeper in Christ. [Nneka] I had Armond and a few of my other friends. I am fortunate to have God fearing, Christian friends who were very supportive during that time.


Armond: Some reading this may think celibacy is "optional". Can you shed some light on the importance of knowing that this is something God asks us to do?
God had it right all along. Sex is to be reserved for a man and a woman under the confines of a marriage. Yes, sex is good...real good, but done outside of the proper context it has the potential to have devastating consequences. Can God still restore one whose fallen victim to the consequences of sexual sin? Absolutely, but we must understand that it was never His intent that we contract HIV/AIDS, STDs, become parents before we are even adults ourselves...these things are not part of God's intentionality for His children. They are the results of our disobedience to His will as it relates to sex. Within the faith community, we've kind of allowed sex to become trivialized and treat it as an "acceptable sin." As a result, celibacy becomes more of an option than a mandate/requirement and much of the conviction around it has been subconsciously diluted. But, we have to recognize that sex outside of marriage IS against God's will. As such, we can't be fooled by the Enemy and just push the "sins" that we enjoy into a closet with no intention of addressing. We have to face them head on and just like all other sins, seek God's help in deliverance. God wants the whole you, not just the parts you're comfortable giving to him. And it is in that regard, that He's asking each of us to submit ourselves as "living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to Him."



Nneka: What does the term "worth the wait" mean to you?
To me, the term worth the wait means a woman knows her value and recognizes that she doesn't have to feel the need to have sex with a man before marriage to keep him. She she is worth waiting for.


Both: Can you share some helpful scriptures that helped you to remain celibate?
These are a few of key verses that helped us in our journey:
• Romans 12:1-2
• 1 Corinthians 6:12-20
• Romans 8:5-8
• 2 Corinthians 5:16-21
• Galatians 5:13-26
• Colossians 3:1-5
• 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8


Check out Armond's site, Kingdom Workshops here and Nneka's blog, Nneka Saran here

Monday, September 19, 2011

[VIDEO FEATURE] "HOW TO LOVE" with JAHA HOWARD

What a great way to start the week, talking about love. It's not too often that we hear what real love is: the Christ-like kind of love that we all need, and for some, are seeking. Most importantly though, is knowing how to express love. A lot of times we can reduce love to a feeling or an emotion when it's so much more than that. Today, Jaha Howard of Hiding In Christ shares with us, How to Love via a two-part video series. If you need an honest, candid look at what love is, then this is for you.






Check out Jaha's channel here.

Friday, September 16, 2011

COMING UP ON CHRONICLES: REAL LOVE & KICKING IT WITH THE MOSLEYS

Hello all and Happy Friday. I hope you all had a great week. I have some good things coming up on the blog and look forward to sharing them with you. See what's coming up on Chronicles next week:

REAL LOVE
Monday
Photo Credit
It's always refreshing to get a Christ-like perspective on what love is. Oftentimes we need to be reminded that love is an action, unconditional, and a lot of times, not about us.
Be here on Monday as I share a two-part series by Mr. Jaha Howard titled, "How to Love."



KICKING IT WITH THE MOSLEYS
After reading Armond's book, Rededication and being inspired by Nneka's blog, Nneka Saran (I literally gasped when I saw her wedding dress) of course I had to get them both on Chronicles. We'll be kicking it with the Mosleys as they share their beautiful love story and gorgeous wedding. And if you've been any where near my Twitter, you've heard me brag about Rededication. So, it's only fitting that someone be blessed by this great book :-)

Tuesday


Wednesday


Thursday
(I feel like giving something away...) :-)

Have a fantastic weekend everyone.

Monday, September 12, 2011

{THE WHOLE WOMAN BLOGSHOP} DR. TAFFY TALKS MONEY MATTERS

One of the things that I'm striving to do as a single person is to have a healthy financial status. That comes in the form of (in my case) self discipline: knowing when I can and can't afford something, differentiating between a want and a need, putting aside money for a rainy day or unforeseen circumstances, and tithing. Today's feature helped me to gain a better understanding of how to be more financial responsible. If you need help in this area, this is just for you.


Dr. Taffy Wagner, Financial Consultant


What is your definition of financial responsibility?
Financial responsibility is living within your means and not falling to the pressure of peers, media or even sales once going into the stores.

How do you encourage your clients to maintain a healthy financial status?
In order to maintain a healthy financial status they have to stay focused, set realistic goals and continuously monitor their accounts (bank, savings, investments and retirement). Sometimes when people are doing good, they want to step back and stop doing the monitoring and that is when something inevitably slips through the cracks. I encourage them to keep a track of the small achievements as well as the big ones.

What are some things we should prioritize to help maintain a healthy financial status?
First: Savings should be either number one or number two. Why? Because people often do not save money - some have not been taught how to save and others are so overwhelmed with life, they don't even know where to start.

Second: Be knowledgeable of exactly what all the income is that a person has coming in as well as what the expenses are. Then knowing what their debt is whether it is credit cards, student loans or even car loans. Tracking is key whether you utilize an online spreadsheet, accounting program or ledger. When you are tracking income and expenses it helps you determine where you can trim extraneous expenses.

Third: Plan your spending for large ticket items. That means put the cash away in an account or purchase at a place that offers a lay-away plan. There is nothing derogatory about layaway. Once you are done paying for the item(s) - you OWN them! People need to get in the habit of being owners instead of renters or buying on credit today with tomorrow's money from a job that is not promised to you.

How can financial irresponsibility now affect future endeavors, including marriage?
Financial irresponsibility hinders home ownership, parenting, furthering education and even automobile purchases. It sends a message that you are not credit worthy to lenders. That may not necessarily be true because sure enough life happens, however, there are times when people do not take responsibility for their lack of financial knowledge or behavior.

When it comes to marriage, let's be real - many people do not want to marry someone that is bringing a lot of debt into a marriage. Unfortunately some people have a bad financial history and they are looking for a spouse with bank to bail them out. Let me be clear – a husband is not a financial plan! Whatever your financial situation, it is your responsibility to develop a debt removal plan and/or credit clean up.

How important is tithing as it pertains to financial responsibility?
Tithing is an individual decision and is based on individual's faith. I would not say that the people reading this must do it or they shouldn't. What I will say is this, when it comes to tithing and financial responsibility - understand that 100% of all the money you make belongs to God. Don't just be a good steward of the 10% and the 90% be out of order. IF you are going to follow the BIBLE, then know that the BIBLE also says in Ecclesiastes 5:5 - It is better not to make a promise than to make one and not keep it.

When people buy on credit, they promised that store or credit card company that they were going to pay that bill! Do not get caught not paying your bills. That's not a testimony to GOD!

I am speaking from experience and was caught in the 10/90. Unfortunately many people get caught up in the 10/90 and not paying their bills and end up facing lights being cut off, foreclosure, cars being repossessed etc.

What advice would you give to someone who is trying to live beyond their means, and is struggling financially?
If it is your goal to struggle financially, a lack of money affecting your health and job performance and not be able to have a decent quality of life, then continue doing what you are doing. However, if you desire to be debt free, have a savings account, maybe one day purchase a home and much more then set your sights on the bigger picture. Stop caving in to the pressure of sales, peers and the JONESES! The Joneses are broke and you will not know it because you are not in their home at night when they are fighting about overspending and a lack of money to pay the bills. Sure people can always give the appearance of having it altogether and inside everything is crumbling. Focus on your own household and finances, so that your financial future is bright and not gloomy. Set yourself up for financial success and not strain.



Visiting Dr. Taffy on her site Money Talk Matters here


{THE WHOLE WOMAN BLOGSHOP} TODAY'S GUEST: DR. TAFFY WAGNER

There's nothing like knowing you are in good financial standing. I don't mean how much money you have in the bank. I mean, knowing you aren't going broke trying to keep up with the Joneses, that you aren't making poor financial decisions for a momentary fix (i.e. buying those pair of shoes or new dress you can wait to purchase), or that you are being a faithful tither. Today's guest, Dr. Taffy Wagner speaks openly, honestly, and frankly about financial responsibility. She will help you to look at just how you're spending your money. But first, get to know Dr. Taffy. Her feature to follow.


Dr. Taffy Wagner is a Certified Educator in Personal Finances, Money and Marriage Advocate and an Ordained Minister. She is also the author of Bride and Groom Money Talk FAQ, Debt Dilemma and Homebuyer’s Helper (How to Have and Hold on to your House). Dr. Wagner has been interviewed by The Denver Business Journal, Bob Brinker Money Talk, AOL Black Voices, The Associated Press, US News and World Report, Called Magazine and Woman’s Day regarding handling money before and after saying “I Do”. She provides premarital and post-marital financial counseling. She conducts seminars for individuals, couples, single parents and small groups regarding personal finances, home ownership and women’s issues.



MY 9/11 WEEKEND AND WWB UPDATE

Good Day all. I tried to get on last night to give an update but I was so tired, I couldn't. Yesterday was my parents' 44th anniversary, so my family went out to spend time with my mom (did I tell you that she's back at home, in a rehab facility? I'll have to give an update). It was also my nephew's birthday as well. Then, my dad and I went out to dinner which, afterward, rendered me useless lol. I came back home, took care of some stuff and chilled for the rest of the day. [Below is a picture of my folks and nephew :-) ]


Just wanted to let you know that today is the official wrap of the Whole Woman blogshop. The final feature for today is by Dr. Taffy Wagner, who will be sharing some very good tips and insight on money matters. Her "get to know" feature will follow this post, then her main feature will be posted.

Thank you to everyone who has followed the series. I really appreciate it. I hope you got something out of all the features that were posted. I will have updates on what's coming on Chronicles later. Have a super Monday.

WE REMEMBER

9/11 TEN-YEAR ANNIVERSARY ~TRIBUTE
I can't leave this post without paying my respects to those who lost their lives on a day that affected our entire country. I watched the movie, Flight 93, a documentary and features to commemorate the day.  My heart ached as I watched the accounts that happened on that day. But, after 10 years, there is still hope, resilience, forgiveness and even a bright outlook in the hearts of many that were directly affected by that tragic day that says, "Let's move forward." I thought that was a great way to sum up how we all should approach that day. Never forgetting, but moving forward.


Friday, September 9, 2011

{THE WHOLE WOMAN BLOGSHOP} FIT AND FABULOUS: CHELSEA PICKENS

Incorporating some type of activity in your every day life may not be as challenging as it sounds, especially when you like the activity that you're doing. Today's feature made me rethink that the idea of being active had to be a chore. It doesn't. Including activities in our lives that we like to do will compel us to want to do things that will help us live a healthier lifestyle. Take a few queues from today's guest, Chelsea Pickens, who maintains a healthy lifestyle doing the things that she likes.


You've maintained a pretty active lifestyle over the years. What motivated you to remain active?
I have always had a love for being active - whether it be playing sports or just going to the gym. Since I enjoyed being active while playing sports in high school and college, I decided to maintain that lifestyle as an adult.



What are some fitness activities that you do?
Recently, I developed a love for running. Ever since I completed my first 5k three years ago, my interest has grown from there. Since then, I've completed 3 races, and 1 sprint triathlon. My goal is to run a marathon by next year.


Do you have weight/fitness goals?
I always have a goal that I am trying to reach to keep challenging myself. I believe that if you don't set goals, you have no purpose.



How often do you workout?
I normally workout at least 3 to 4 times per week. Of course many times life gets in the way, and I may skip here and there, but it's nothing like starting back up again.


Do you workout alone or with a workout buddy?
I believe you have more motivation when you workout with a partner. It's always fun to have a friendly competition. My boyfriend and I always challenge each other.

If you miss a day, or a few days of activity, do you make up for it with extra workouts or do you remain on your same workout schedule?
That question is right on time because I just missed a week of working out due to travel. When this happens, I normally tweak my workouts by adding more repetitions or increase the weights I lift. I also try to curve my eating a little bit more so I won't feel as guilty. However, it's okay to cheat sometimes; just make sure it's in moderation.



Do you work out to music? If so, what are some songs on your work out playlist?
Working out to music is a must for me. On those days where I don't feel up to working out, a little Beyonce or Lil Wayne can always get me going. My latest favs right now are Beyonce's Run the World (Girls), Waka Flocka No Hands, and I gotta have my New Orleans music Do Whatcha Wanna by Rebirth Brass Band.



What are some health issues you think you've avoided because of your active lifestyle?
High blood pressure and arthritis runs in my family, so I think I've been able to avoid these by staying active, and watching what I eat.


What would you say to motivate someone to include some type of activity in her life?
I would ask that person where do they see themselves in 5 - 10 years. And whether it's having a family, or being promoted in a job, I would recommend using that to motivate you in staying healthy.